{"id":60,"date":"2026-10-27T13:34:33","date_gmt":"2026-10-27T13:34:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/the-argument-is-never-about-the-dishes\/"},"modified":"2026-10-27T13:34:38","modified_gmt":"2026-10-27T13:34:38","slug":"the-argument-is-never-about-the-dishes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/the-argument-is-never-about-the-dishes\/","title":{"rendered":"The argument is never about the dishes"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"60\" class=\"elementor elementor-60\">\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1913a008 e-flex e-con-boxed e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"1913a008\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"e-con-inner\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-469fc78c e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"469fc78c\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7f4788af e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"7f4788af\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7ab3b812 elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"7ab3b812\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/\">Home<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-511e07ee elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"511e07ee\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\/<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1697ea95 elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"1697ea95\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/blog\/\">Blog<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-cfa53af elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"cfa53af\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\/<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-a47db5 elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"a47db5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Article<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1b683a5f e-grid e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"1b683a5f\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-600564dd elementor-widget elementor-widget-gum_heading\" data-id=\"600564dd\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"gum_heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"gum-widget-title\"><h1 class=\"section-main-title size-default\">The argument is never about the dishes<\/h1><\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3d6ca1e4 elementor-widget__width-initial elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"3d6ca1e4\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">What couples are really asking each other when the same fight comes round again, and how to answer the question underneath.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t<section class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-47417bd5 e-flex e-con-boxed e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"47417bd5\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"e-con-inner\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3455a7dd e-flex e-con-full animated-fast elementor-invisible e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"3455a7dd\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;animation&quot;:&quot;fadeIn&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1020539b elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-gum_post_meta\" data-id=\"1020539b\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"gum_post_meta.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"posts-meta\"><li class=\"list-meta\"><i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"\"><\/i><span class=\"meta-text\">admin<\/span><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-53b25208 elementor-post-meta-divider-text elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-gum_post_meta\" data-id=\"53b25208\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"gum_post_meta.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"posts-meta\"><li class=\"list-meta\"><i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"\"><\/i><span class=\"meta-text\">October 27, 2026<\/span><\/li><li class=\"meta-divider\"><span>\u00b7<\/span><\/li><li class=\"list-meta\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/category\/couples\/\"><i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"\"><\/i><span class=\"meta-text\">Couples<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-117cc2a9 animated-fast elementor-invisible elementor-widget elementor-widget-gum_post_image\" data-id=\"117cc2a9\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_animation&quot;:&quot;fadeIn&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"gum_post_image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"blog-featureimage\" style=\"background-image: url(https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/post-dishes-1.jpg)\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/post-dishes-1.jpg\" title=\"\" alt=\"\" \/><\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5e04151b e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"5e04151b\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-634ad1af e-flex e-con-full animated-fast elementor-invisible e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"634ad1af\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;animation&quot;:&quot;fadeIn&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5046b0f4 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"5046b0f4\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Couples often tell us the fight is about chores, money or time with family. Ten minutes in, it turns out to be about something else: feeling noticed, feeling fair, feeling like a team.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-49124022 e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"49124022\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6fb06aa8 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"6fb06aa8\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">In this article<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7835ca18 e-grid e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"7835ca18\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c635681 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"c635681\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"#start\">The fight under the fight<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-24af186f elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"24af186f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"#say\">Openings that lower the heat<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6459c938 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"6459c938\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"#ask\">What a therapist will ask<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-78bdbc57 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"78bdbc57\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"#bring\">What to bring to a session<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7819c0c0 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"7819c0c0\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><a href=\"#after\">After a hard conversation<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-b9e89b5 elementor-widget elementor-widget-menu-anchor\" data-id=\"b9e89b5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"menu-anchor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-menu-anchor\" id=\"start\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4671e658 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"4671e658\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">The fight under the fight<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-52ea9b65 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"52ea9b65\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">The same argument returns because the real question never gets answered. \"Why are the dishes still there?\" often means \"Do you see how much I am carrying?\"<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-43efd23f elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"43efd23f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Once a couple can hear that question, the dishes become easy. Until then, every solution to the dishes feels like it misses the point, because it does.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1b99a311 e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"1b99a311\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-39c0fae0 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"39c0fae0\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">I rarely help couples solve the problem they arrive with. I help them hear the one underneath, and then they solve it themselves.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6b764694 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"6b764694\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Daniel Reyes, LMFT, from the room<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1ed000f6 elementor-widget elementor-widget-menu-anchor\" data-id=\"1ed000f6\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"menu-anchor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-menu-anchor\" id=\"say\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-445a264c elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"445a264c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Openings that lower the heat<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-27d302dc elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"27d302dc\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">How a hard conversation starts usually decides how it ends. These openings keep it from becoming a trial.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-42a9b806 e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"42a9b806\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3af17e77 e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"3af17e77\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3b966021 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"3b966021\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\"Can we talk about this when we are both calm?\"<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c231e08 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"c231e08\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Timing is half of a good conversation.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-56f11622 e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"56f11622\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2a934a5 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"2a934a5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\"I feel alone with this.\"<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-486e4e02 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"486e4e02\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Feelings are easier to hear than charges.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-57642781 e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"57642781\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6fcf3378 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"6fcf3378\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\"What would help you right now?\"<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5fbf020e elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"5fbf020e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">A question invites your partner in.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-670a94bc e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"670a94bc\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4dd151a7 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"4dd151a7\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\"I want us to be on the same side.\"<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1bb3c2ca elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"1bb3c2ca\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">It names the goal before the detail.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-43812a4c elementor-widget elementor-widget-menu-anchor\" data-id=\"43812a4c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"menu-anchor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-menu-anchor\" id=\"ask\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-27ca8c3f elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"27ca8c3f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">What a therapist will ask<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-ed99770 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"ed99770\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">In couples work, both of you have a voice, and the therapist does not take sides. Expect questions like these.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2feb0287 elementor-icon-list--layout-traditional elementor-list-item-link-full_width elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon-list\" data-id=\"2feb0287\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon-list.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"elementor-icon-list-items\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">When did you last feel like a team?<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">What happens in your body when this argument starts?<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">What do you each wish the other understood?<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">What would a good week together look like?<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/ul>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-67b3070f elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"67b3070f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Most couples come for eight to twelve sessions. Some come with a crisis; many come simply because they want the next ten years to be better than the last two.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-133385cd e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"133385cd\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-68787bec elementor-widget elementor-widget-elementskit-heading\" data-id=\"68787bec\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"elementskit-heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"ekit-wid-con\" ><div class=\"ekit-heading elementskit-section-title-wraper text_left   ekit_heading_tablet-   ekit_heading_mobile-\"><p class=\"ekit-heading--title elementskit-section-title \">The goal is not to stop arguing. It is to argue in a way that <span>brings<\/span> <span>you<\/span> <span>closer.<\/span><\/p><\/div><\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-415be98e elementor-widget elementor-widget-menu-anchor\" data-id=\"415be98e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"menu-anchor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-menu-anchor\" id=\"bring\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-61c29c94 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"61c29c94\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">What to bring to a session<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-65b33219 elementor-icon-list--layout-traditional elementor-list-item-link-full_width elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon-list\" data-id=\"65b33219\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon-list.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"elementor-icon-list-items\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">One example of a recent argument, small is fine.<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">A sense of what is going well, not only what is not.<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">Your diaries, so you can plan regular sessions.<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fas-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M256 8C119 8 8 119 8 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S393 8 256 8z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">A willingness to listen as much as to speak.<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/ul>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1bd43ffa elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"1bd43ffa\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Sessions are seventy-five minutes, in person on Monroe Street or online from home.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-471b937e elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-button\" data-id=\"471b937e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"button.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-button elementor-button-link elementor-size-sm\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/services\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-content-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-text\">Couples counseling<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4bc5fdd5 elementor-widget elementor-widget-menu-anchor\" data-id=\"4bc5fdd5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"menu-anchor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-menu-anchor\" id=\"after\"><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-12ac8eb4 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"12ac8eb4\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">After a hard conversation<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-49532c2e elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"49532c2e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">After a hard session, give each other some space before picking it up again. Agree a time to come back to it rather than letting it run on into the evening.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3b69c980 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"3b69c980\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">If one of you is unsure about coming, start with a free call together. It is a low-stakes way to see whether this could help.<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1346bd7d e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"1346bd7d\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3b11dadd elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-gum_post_meta\" data-id=\"3b11dadd\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"gum_post_meta.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"posts-meta\"><li class=\"list-meta\"><i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"\"><\/i><span class=\"meta-text\">Written by  admin<\/span><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7602b90c elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-button\" data-id=\"7602b90c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"button.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-button elementor-button-link elementor-size-sm\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/therapists\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-content-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-text\">Meet our therapists<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t<section class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7cfc96f4 e-flex e-con-boxed e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"7cfc96f4\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"e-con-inner\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-109e0e1c e-flex e-con-full animated-fast elementor-invisible e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"109e0e1c\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;animation&quot;:&quot;fadeIn&quot;}\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-edbc1db e-flex e-con-full e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"edbc1db\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1206e12e elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"1206e12e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Keep reading<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1f622737 elementor-widget elementor-widget-elementskit-heading\" data-id=\"1f622737\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"elementskit-heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"ekit-wid-con\" ><div class=\"ekit-heading elementskit-section-title-wraper text_left   ekit_heading_tablet-   ekit_heading_mobile-\"><h2 class=\"ekit-heading--title elementskit-section-title \">More from <span>the<\/span> <span>therapy<\/span> <span>room.<\/span><\/h2><\/div><\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-36b1fdf8 elementor-widget__width-auto elementor-widget elementor-widget-button\" data-id=\"36b1fdf8\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"button.default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-button elementor-button-link elementor-size-sm\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/blog\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-content-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-text\">All articles<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7e1dff0f post-grid-col-3 post-grid-col-tablet-3 post-grid-col-mobile-1 animated-fast elementor-invisible elementor-widget elementor-widget-gum_posts_grid\" data-id=\"7e1dff0f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_animation&quot;:&quot;fadeIn&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"gum_posts_grid.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"grid-posts\"><div class=\"grid-post grid-col-3 image-position-top\"><article id=\"post-84\" class=\"post-84 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-first-steps\">\r\n      <div class=\"post-top\">\r\n<ul class=\"meta-position-before posts-meta\"><\/ul>        <div class=\"blog-image\" style=\"background-image: url('https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/h3-call-1.jpg');\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/h3-call-1.jpg\" title=\"\" alt=\"\" \/><\/div>\r\n    <ul class=\"meta-position-after posts-meta\"><\/ul>  <\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"post-content\">\r\n      <ul class=\"meta-position-top posts-meta\"><li class=\"list-meta category_meta\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/category\/first-steps\/\"><span class=\"meta-text\">First steps<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><h3 class=\"post-title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/five-questions-to-ask-a-therapist-before-you-book\/\">Five questions to ask a therapist before you book<\/a><\/h3><ul class=\"meta-position-mid posts-meta\"><\/ul>      <div class=\"content-excerpt clearfix\">Fit matters more than credentials. Five plain questions that tell you whether a therapist is right for you.<\/div>      <ul class=\"meta-position-content posts-meta\"><\/ul>        <\/div>\r\n  <ul class=\"meta-position-bottom posts-meta\"><\/ul><\/article>\r\n<\/div><div class=\"grid-post grid-col-3 image-position-top\"><article id=\"post-80\" class=\"post-80 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-mens-health\">\r\n      <div class=\"post-top\">\r\n<ul class=\"meta-position-before posts-meta\"><\/ul>        <div class=\"blog-image\" style=\"background-image: url('https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/fmt-room-1.jpg');\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/fmt-room-1.jpg\" title=\"\" alt=\"\" \/><\/div>\r\n    <ul class=\"meta-position-after posts-meta\"><\/ul>  <\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"post-content\">\r\n      <ul class=\"meta-position-top posts-meta\"><li class=\"list-meta category_meta\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/category\/mens-health\/\"><span class=\"meta-text\">Men's health<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><h3 class=\"post-title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/why-so-many-men-wait-to-ask-for-help\/\">Why so many men wait to ask for help<\/a><\/h3><ul class=\"meta-position-mid posts-meta\"><\/ul>      <div class=\"content-excerpt clearfix\">Most of the men we see waited years. What finally brought them in, in their own words.<\/div>      <ul class=\"meta-position-content posts-meta\"><\/ul>        <\/div>\r\n  <ul class=\"meta-position-bottom posts-meta\"><\/ul><\/article>\r\n<\/div><div class=\"grid-post grid-col-3 image-position-top\"><article id=\"post-76\" class=\"post-76 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-groups\">\r\n      <div class=\"post-top\">\r\n<ul class=\"meta-position-before posts-meta\"><\/ul>        <div class=\"blog-image\" style=\"background-image: url('https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/post-group-1.jpg');\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/38\/2026\/10\/post-group-1.jpg\" title=\"\" alt=\"\" \/><\/div>\r\n    <ul class=\"meta-position-after posts-meta\"><\/ul>  <\/div>\r\n        <div class=\"post-content\">\r\n      <ul class=\"meta-position-top posts-meta\"><li class=\"list-meta category_meta\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/category\/groups\/\"><span class=\"meta-text\">Groups<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><h3 class=\"post-title\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/what-actually-happens-in-a-group-session\/\">What actually happens in a group session<\/a><\/h3><ul class=\"meta-position-mid posts-meta\"><\/ul>      <div class=\"content-excerpt clearfix\">Nobody makes you share. What the first group night looks like, from the chair by the door.<\/div>      <ul class=\"meta-position-content posts-meta\"><\/ul>        <\/div>\r\n  <ul class=\"meta-position-bottom posts-meta\"><\/ul><\/article>\r\n<\/div><\/div><div class=\"not-empty\">&nbsp;<\/div>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What couples are really asking each other when the same fight comes round again.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":63,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"elementor_header_footer","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-60","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-couples"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=60"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":196,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60\/revisions\/196"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/63"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=60"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=60"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wp-templatekit.codeinsolution.com\/ovel\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=60"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}